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Oh, thank you for putting me out of my misery!

Fox has wisely and quickly axed the mind-bogglingly bad new sitcom The Return of Jezebel James, brought to the television-watching world by much-loved Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman-Palladino.

This development, which is effective immediately, will have two consequences. First, four of the seven produced episodes of the series will mercifully not air. Second, the same pretty much goes for the repeats of ‘Til Death that began coming on before the series at 8pm EST.

Actually, both outcomes are good news for fans of the excellent forensic procedural Bones, though, since that show will now return to the 8pm–9pm time slot on Fridays, where it had been in repeats prior to Jezebel’s debut.

I’m not a Gilmore groupie, but I sincerely hope Jezebel was just a one-time glitch in Sherman-Palladino’s TV career. And, to be clear — the canned laugh track had not a thing to do with Jezebel’s lousiness. It was the writing and execution of said writing, folks. If you don’t believe it, watch with closed captioning enabled and the sound turned down or off, and the show still reeks.

But, wait — you can’t do that anymore. Great!

Original Air Date: March 21, 2008

Well, I tried to be patient and give Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman-Palladino one more chance to get her new sitcom right, and she didn’t do it. Simply put, The Return of Jezebel James stinks. The show isn’t funny at all. Worse, the characters have zero personality and even less rapport with one another.

It’s hard to believe that an entertainment figure who enjoys so much adoration from so many fans could create something so unbelievably bad. Yet, the proof is in the dud Fox is currently was airing. At least now I understand why the network reduced the series order from an original 13 episodes to just 7. Executives should have shaved off even more installments.

In the third episode of the series, SARAH is first obsessed with getting her sister COCO to pick out paint colors for her bedroom. Since she hired some high-profile painters who just did the Guggenheim, time is of the essence to avoid losing them through a cancellation.

Unfortunately, like zillions of people who don’t work 9-to-5 jobs, Coco doesn’t keep early morning hours like her big sister. So, the entire first five unending minutes of the episode are devoted to showing Sarah and her assistant BUDDY trying to wake up a sleeping Coco. Yawn.

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I’m looking forward to the next episode of The Return of Jezebel James only because I genuinely want the show to redeem itself after the dreadful first two installments. No TV series should be that bad all the time.

On “Needles & Schlag,” children’s book editor Sarah goes out of her way to woo a teenaged author who proves more difficult than expected to please.

The sisters also visit the gynecologist — always a fun time, especially for female bonding — where Coco reveals some of the surrogacy issues that have been bothering her. I’m sure Sarah will react in her normal calm manner (that was sarcasm, folks).

The Return of Jezebel James airs Fridays on Fox at 8:30pm EST.

Original Air Date: March 14, 2008

On the second episode of this unfunny sitcom from Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman-Palladino, the main character, SARAH TOMPKINS, lives in an entirely different place than in the preceding pilot episode — and there’s zero explanation why. Before, she lived in a brownstone or house, a fact that was apparent in the pilot’s very first scene, when she opened the front door next to her living room for a neighborhood boy who lived across the street. The street and nearby homes were even partially visible through the door.

Now, Sarah lives in a huge co-op apartment that only an independently wealthy book editor could afford. She gives an unimpressed COCO the grand tour, blabbering the entire time, until their father RONALD shows up unexpectedly and both sister grow anxious — Sarah because she knows her dad hasn’t seen Coco in a while, and Coco because she thinks his arrival indicates a set-up intervention, an event that has happened before apparently.

Ron comes in with the couch he found on the street in the pilot episode, which he’s reupholstered especially for Sarah since her ex took their old couch with him when he left. Ron doesn’t notice Coco during his long monologue about the piece of furniture. Sarah has to point her younger sister out, and even then, it’s no big deal to their father.

Coco soon wonders why their mother TALIA hasn’t come in, and Sarah reveals she won’t unless she’s invited. (And, yes, the similarity to a vampire is duly noted.) Talia arrives after Sarah goes down to the car to get her, and the two sisters reveal the baby development to their parents next.

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Original Air Date: March 14, 2008

SARAH TOMPKINS, a successful children’s book editor in her late 30s, just broke up with her boyfriend of ten years named Matt. Although they were together for a decade, they never got married or had children. As a result, Sarah’s father is gravely concerned that if she waits much longer, she’ll never have kids because she’ll be too old.

Despite her anal-retentiveness and dedication to her career, Sarah is ready to have a child, and she pursues getting pregnant with a sperm donor. Her doctor informs her that she won’t be able to conceive, however, because she has a condition called Asherman’s Syndrome that causes scarring on the uterus. It’s possible to correct the problem surgically sometimes, but not in Sarah’s case.

Sarah’s first reaction to the news is disbelief. So, she tells her doctor a childhood story about how she wanted to be a cheerleader, which required doing cartwheels. She couldn’t, though, and she forced herself to stay outside one day until she learned how to do them perfectly in both directions. Unimpressed, the doctor suggests she consider adoption. But, Sarah is against that option because she doesn’t even like strangers using her bathroom.

Sarah takes the adoption literature the doctor offers anyway, and we next see her frazzled after having dinner with MARCUS, her “no drama, no emotions, just sex” man-friend. Marcus notices that Sarah’s been out of it all evening, but since they don’t discuss anything significant, all she does is bawl and talk nonsense.

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Monday | March 17

• The Big Bang Theory, How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men: All three CBS Monday-night comedies return to the tube with brand-new episodes. It’s about time! [8pm EST/CBS]

Tuesday | March 18

• The Riches: The second season begins with The Last Temptation of Wayne [10pm EST/FX]
• The Truth Behind the Sitcom Scandals: First up on this titillating new exposé series: MASH and The Love Boat. [10pm EST/Biography Channel]
• Miss/Guided: The Alphabet Network presents its latest sitcom with the opening episode Homecoming. Note that this is a special broadcast and the series normally airs back-to-back episodes on Thursdays from 8pm–9pm. [10:32pm EST/ABC]

Wednesday | March 19

• Biography: Why not? The focus of this particular episode is Oscar winner Jamie Foxx, who always has been and always will be a comedian, too. [10pm EST/Biography Channel]

Thursday | March 20

• Lipstick Jungle: More episodes have been ordered, but tonight’s Chapter Seven: Carpe Threesome is still the first-season finale. [10:01pm EST/NBC]

Friday | March 21

• ‘Til Death: Friday-night repeats kick in with the November 2007 episode Vintage Eddie. [8pm EST/Fox]
• The Return of Jezebel James: Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman-Palladino’s absolutely horrid new sitcom moves to its regular time slot with Needles & Schlag. [8:30pm EST/Fox]

Saturday | March 22

• Comedy Specials: The King of Queens‘ Kevin James, Blue Collar Comedy Tour’s Ron White, and Last Comic Standing first-season first runner-up Ralphie May all have one-hour primetime specials scheduled: Sweat the Small Stuff, You Can’t Fix Stupid, and Girth of a Nation, respectively. [8pm, 9pm, 10pm EST/Comedy Central]

Sunday | March 23

• Unhitched: The sitcom gets an extra episode, Mardi Gras Croc Attack, at 8:30pm, in addition to the regularly scheduled episode Pole-Dancing Toddler at 9:30pm. I’d just like to know who comes up with those ridiculous titles, though. [8:30pm and 9:30pm EST/Fox]
• The Game: Melanie & Company resume their second season with Take These Vows and Shove ‘Em!. The 4400 and That ’70s Show’s Megalyn Echikunwoke guest stars. [9pm EST/The CW]

Monday | March 10

• The New Adventures of Old Christine: Two new episodes premiere: The New Adventures of Old Christine and House [8:30pm & 9:30pm EST/CBS]

Tuesday | March 11

• According to Jim: First up is the premature seventh-season finale Pregnancy Brain due to the writers strike, followed by a repeat of the seventh-season premiere Jim Almighty, featuring Six Million Dollar Man Lee Majors as God. [9pm & 9:30pm EST/ABC]

Wednesday | March 12

• South Park: The 12th season opens. [10pm EST/Comedy Central]
• Lewis Black’s Root of All Evil: New talk show. [10:30pm EST/Comedy Central]

Thursday | March 13

• Reaper: Fresh deviled stuff in a new, temporary post-Smallville time slot. The episode is Hungry for Fame, guest starring very funny guy Jamie Kennedy. [9pm EST/The CW]

Friday | March 14

• The Return of Jezebel James: Fox’s latest sitcom is from Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman-Palladino, stars Parker Posey and Lauren Ambrose, and opens with two back-to-back episodes: Pilot and Frankenstein Baby. [8pm & 8:30pm EST/Fox]

Saturday | March 15

• Saturday Night Live: Jonah Hill (Superbad) hosts and Janet Jackson Mariah Carey performs (Jackson has the flu). [11:29pm EST/NBC]

Sunday | March 16

• World’s Funniest Commercials: I don’t watch commercials when I can help it, but if you do, this edition of the occasional special is all about “Hilarious Liaisons.” [8pm EST/TBS]

…and not earlier either.

First, Fox announced last October that it planned to shorten the already traditionally short freshman season of the Parker Posey-Lauren Ambrose midseason series The Return of Jezebel James from an original thirteen episodes to a mere seven.

Now comes word that the network has rescheduled the premiere later than the previously announced date, moving it from Wednesday, March 12, following the coveted lead-in American Idol to Friday, March 14, at 8pm EST.

The bad news is tempered with mild good news, however — on premiere night, viewers will get a double serving of the sitcom created by Gilmore Girls‘ Amy Sherman-Palladino during the two-episode, hourlong broadcast.

Place your bets now on whether Jezebel will get picked up for a sophomore season. With continuous disses like these, it looks like Fox executives have already made up their collective mind before the public has even had a chance to weigh in. I hope that isn’t so, though.

Well, here’s a series and star that we haven’t been seeing on any of the talk shows lately, former Six Feet Under cast member Lauren Ambrose, who stops by to chat with the outspoken ladies on The View tomorrow.

Comedy fans are probably aware that Ambrose plays Parker Posey’s younger sister on the forthcoming Fox sitcom The Return of Jezebel James, which premieres on March 7 with a shortened season. But, the famously red-headed and talented actress will likely be devoting most of her talk time on The View to Starting Out in the Evening, the independent feature film co-starring Frank Langella and Lili Taylor that has just about everyone who’s seen it thinking of the Academy Awards already. For now, though, we can catch Ambrose’s interview tomorrow morning.